Arnica Anonymous

A few weeks ago I told one of my friends, "You know, I am nothing like I would have expected to be ten years ago. Or even five years ago."  After all, I grew up as a tom-boy believing all emotions were useless things that got in the way of logic and sense and that functionality always trumped beauty.

INFJ -- I've mentioned before that this is my Myers-Briggs personality type. What I haven't told you is that I am not all the internet believes an INFJ is. INFJ's are portrayed as rigidly upright, unfailingly thoughtful, unendingly self-less. I believe that most of those with this personality type are really like that.  Or at least, do their best to be. I am not like that.

  (I would recommend caution for young readers. This post is unusually gritty for me and may not be suitable for young minds.) It's a rare thing that I feel the need to add my two cents to a viral controversy but a recent influx of Facebook posts by some friends I once loved dearly has made me think a lot and you get to reap the benefits of this thinking! ;) The controversial issue I am speaking of is modesty.

I have always enjoyed the book of Philippians though until today I had not known why. This morning as  I began my (sometimes) daily Bible study I decided to do a little research on the setting of Philippians. It's a sweet story.

My most recent watercolor--a phoenix! I've always liked the idea of the mythical phoenix--a bird that ends it's life in a crash of flames and then rises from it's ashes a new creature. I like to think of it  as a picture of myself. I burn up, crash, and turn to blackened ash, but thanks to the Lord I rise again with strength renewed.

When I was younger I saw that life was simple and straightforward. I knew the right things to do and I knew that if I did them, my life would be pleasant. But that is not always the way God chooses to teach me lessons. Sometimes,  I need to have my life not follow perfect patterns so that I have to lean on Jesus more. That is the story of Mac.

When I was thirteen my head conquered my heart long enough for me to pray a prayer-- "Lord, if I am to get married then I beg that you would only ever have one guy, the right one, be interested in me." God has seen fit to not answer that prayer with a "yes".