But I don't feel like being disciplined!

Since I am blogging anonymously* I don't see much point in introducing myself. Let's skip that and dive right in to what I have been thinking about a learning lately as it relates to my life and the Bible. 

My Grandma moved recently into an independent living center. In order to fit into her new apartment she had to severely downsize which was sad for a book lover like herself.

"Arnica," she called me over to the box she was packing one snowy afternoon. "I wish you would take this book. It is very good but I don't think I need it any more."

She held out a fuzzy blue copy of Disciplines of the Beautiful Woman by Anne Ortlund.

"Thanks Grandma!" I smiled and took it from her. "Mom and I read one of her other books together when I was in high school and I learned a lot from it. I'll enjoy this one."

And I have.



When it comes to non-fiction I am a pitifully slow reader. Partly because I keep a decorative little notebook beside me and stop every three pages to write down quotes. I am about halfway through chapter five in this slender little book right now and have been reading it for two weeks.

Despite my snail's pace I have been learning from this book.

I am not a very disciplined person. Especially when it comes to my spiritual life. I know I should be but when the rubber meets the road, I only follow the Lord when I feel like it. In this book Ortlund hurls this fault of mine to the floor and stomps it into oblivion.

Listen to (or rather, read) this quote:
"Spirit  motivated disciplines facilitate the Christian walk. Oh, I'm not discounting all the warm feelings along the route, when I've sung Jesus-songs and held hands and the rest. But our sensuous age forgets that feelings come and feelings leave you, but the disciplines of life are what get you where you want to go."

I might say, "But, my life gets in the way of me being spiritually disciplined!"or "My family keeps me so busy!" etc., etc. But Ortlund foresees this argument and stops it in it's tracks.

On judgment day, when everyone stands before their maker, what will he see?

Me.

Just me.

Not my job. Not my family. Not anything that I might claim could reasonably hold me back from him. I will stand there alone and bear the responsibility for my actions and lack thereof.

And he will look at me and ask, "Why did you not follow me?"

Matthew 6:33 says, "Seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you."

There are many good things in this life but they must never get in the way of my first priority--following Christ with all my heart, soul, and mind.

 *Check out the tab "Why Anonymous" to see why I made this choice.