Rusted Stiff

I was told the other day but a very old family friend that I was a "robot" when it came to emotions. He was not intending it as a complement but rather as an encouragement that it was healthy to have and show emotion. I was both stunned and a little hurt.

Often times I feel rusted stiff inside. I feel one way, but I know I should be feeling another way, or maybe not upset at all. So I wind up an immovable mess, unable to process any emotions correctly.

Reading the Psalms, we see the very emotional journals of David, a passionate man--after God's own heart. He never discounts his emotions, whatever they are. Nor does he tell God what to do about his emotions. Over and over we can find a surprising pattern:

A.) These are my circumstances and how I feel about them.
B.) God is awesome.
C.) Praise the Lord for being awesome and always taking care of me.

He doesn't say whether his feelings are right or wrong. He expresses them and then turns to the Lord and His goodness. David simply moves on to the more important truths of God's character and leaves his emotions  and their solutions in the Lord's hands completely.

God created us as emotional beings. He created us like Him--God is very passionate!

He is not afraid of our emotions. He can handle them.

And if I think about it, who do I feel the closest to? Not those to whom I always say "I love you", "I am happy to see you", etc. No, I am closest to those who I share the raw emotions with. The people who talk to when I am upset because I know they won't judge.

I need to stop allowing myself to feel so tied up by how I should feel that I don't give the Lord a chance to share the bond that comes from expressing to someone how I do feel. And then, because He is my heavenly Father, leaving it all in His hands.